Upgraded: The importance of champagne to Singapore Airlines
“Singapore Airlines Ltd. cut Chief Executive Officer Chew Choon Seng’s salary by 20 percent and parked planes in response to a global travel slump. It didn’t touch the S$11 million (US$8 million) it spends annually on wine and Dom Perignon champagne for first-class passengers.” Fewer planes, but constant wine budget? Say no more.

Upgraded: Clarity on what’s legal in seatback pockets
Remember the semi-secret FAA rule that banned personal items in airline seatback pockets? Last week, Henry Harteveldt tweeted that the FAA had clarified its policy. The entire policy is printed here. The short version: You can keep up to three pounds of stuff in the pocket, presumably including the SkyMall magazine, etc.

Upgraded: United Airlines
It takes a trip to the bottom to warrant an improvement, it seems. United, having peered into the abyss, has announced that they’ll be revamping their aircraft interiors (say goodbye to the “tequila sunrise” decor!) and airport lounges.

Downgraded: Aer Lingus’ Irish-ness
Ireland’s Aer Lingus has applied for an operating license in the UK, which, if granted, would enable the company to relocate its official base of operations to Britain. The reason: A labor dispute with Irish pilots and flight attendants, who are resisting a pay cut. Expect strikes if this goes through.

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For a few years now, there’s been abundant competition for business-class travelers on the trans-Atlantic route, with upstarts carving out all-business class niches to woo passengers away from the major airlines. But until now, there’s been no such movement on the trans-Pacific routes.

But it’s no upstart that’s offering this new service. It’s Singapore Airlines.

They’re converting their ultra-long-haul Airbus 340-500’s to all-business configurations, which means that “Executive Economy” customers are getting the boot. These widebody planes will go from 181 passengers to 100.

Others have already chimed in on the issue. Jared Blank thinks this will be a cash cow. The Cranky Flier is skeptical, calling it a “no-win,” and throwing some barbs at the aircraft for good measure.

Is this a great business move? I don’t know. But my thoughts are this: The supply of business class seats on Singapore Airlines — a truly top-notch airline — just went up big-time. Maybe, just maybe, the frequent flyer seat inventory went up, too. This could be a great opportunity to cash in frequent flyer miles and really get some bang for your proverbial buck.

After all, Newark to Singapore is 9535 nonstop miles, according to the excellent Great Circle Mapper. If ever there’s a flight where you really want to be in business class, it’s this one.

Downgraded: The mile-high club
Singapore Airlines has some of the swankest first class seats — ahem, “suites” — in the sky, but if you want to get frisky with your mate at 39,000 feet, no dice. Despite having a double bed in their suites, the airline enforces a no-sex policy in the sky. Note the key word: enforces. Early passengers on the A380 weren’t pleased:

“So they’ll sell you a double bed, and give you privacy and endless champagne — and then say you can’t do what comes naturally?” asked Tony Elwood, a vigorous 76. “Seems a bit strange.”

Sorry, Tony. Your ticket may say first class, but you and the missus will have to use the lavatory, just like everyone else. Or rent a private love jet for $299.

Downgraded: Airbus’ green claims
One big selling point for modern aircraft is always their lower fuel consumption. Leo Hickman at the Guardian ran the numbers on the A380, and found that Airbus’ calculations are bogus. They assume a full plane of 555 passengers, but zero luggage or cargo, when they calculate the kerosene burn. How realistic. (By the way, Airbus claims that the A380 will burn 2.9 liters of fuel per passenger for every 100km traveled, i.e., 75 grams of carbon dioxide per passenger per km.)

Upgraded: Olde tyme hotel rates
The Palmer House in Chicago is allowing repeat guests to stay there at the rate they paid years ago. A great deal… as long as the earlier stay was fifty years ago or more, and if the guests still have the original receipt. A 1947 receipt will get you a room under $10. Which wasn’t cheap! (Notice to my wife: THIS is why I keep receipts.)

Downgraded: The State Department
Turns out that the $97 passport fee is nicely padded in the government’s favor, far above the cost of processing. Gosh, really?

Downgraded: Surcharges
The seven most annoying travel surcharges, from Chris Elliott. Room service “Tray fee”?? Wow, that’s really brazen.

Downgraded: The TSA
TSA regularly sends staff to conduct internal testing of its security procedures. But it turns out they’re sometimes tipping off the front-line staff in advance. (I know someone who works for TSA, who has had the pleasure of carrying a “bomb” through the airport. Yes, they caught him. Who’da thunk.)

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Upgraded and Downgraded: Virgin America to add inflight wireless internet …and voice
Virgin America will feature inflight wireless internet access on its planes, by working with AirCell (the same company that will roll out inflight wireless on American Airlines’ 767s). Jaunted reports that some unnamed features will be free, too.

Great, right? Well… there’s a catch. Skype is on the list of planned features. Hell is your seatmate shouting, “Guess where I am! No, guess! I’m on a plane!” Screaming madmen yelling at jilted lovers in faraway places could soon be sitting right next to you, laptops open, vocal cords ablaze. Bring the earplugs!

Upgraded: Singapore Airlines reveals its surprisingly spacious A380 layout
The Airbus A380, when packed to the gills with nothing but economy seats, could carry as many as 853 people. The normal three-class provision is estimated at 555 seats. But Singapore’s layout will only feature 471 seats, thanks largely to a boatload of extra-wide business class seats, much like the ones pictured here. To get a glimpse of the seatmap, Click here. Note that the economy class seats on the lower level are configured 3-4-3 and the upper level has them at 2-4-2.

Upgraded: The UK’s Travelodge
Downgraded: Home
An elderly British couple has been living in a Travelodge motel room for over twenty years. Talk about extended stay! Travelodge in the UK is not the same company as in the US. I’ve never stayed in the UK variant, but for their sake, I hope it’s better than the stateside chain. (via BoingBoing)

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Whom or what would they kill to get an upgrade?
Nepal Airlines mechanics sacrificed two goats to appease Akash Bhairab, the Hindu sky god, after they just couldn’t quite fix the problems in their Boeing 757. How many goats does it take to get a 757 to arrive on time at LAX? Slaughtering livestock isn’t limited to Himalayan aviation: Longtime readers may recall that Turkish Airlines maintenance workers killed a camel to celebrate the disposal of a regional jet last year.

$100K isn’t a good flight value
I know it was for charity. But paying $100,000 to fly on the inaugural Airbus A380 flight on Singapore Airlines seems a bit much. Most importantly, will they earn miles?

Shocker: Motel 6 really won’t leave the light on for you
To conserve energy, the ultra-budget chain doesn’t really leave lights on. So says their folksy pitchman Tom Bodett. So you know it’s true.

Delta’s apparently not afraid of the competition
Inside baseball, maybe, but still: Looking over the blogroll at Delta’s blog, I noticed that they link to their competitors: Southwest’s blog. That’s pretty gutsy for a corporate blog!

United names dates and planes for new business class rollout
The first plane to receive the long-awaited upgrade of 180-degree lie-flat seats in the business class cabin: a Boeing 767. It’s scheduled to travel between Washington and Frankfurt on October 29, 2007. Saver awards are unavailable at press time.

US Air Force tags nuclear warheads to wrong airport
Next time your luggage heads to Ketchikan, Alaska instead of Kansas City, take heart: The Air Force does it too. A B-52 bomber mistakenly carried six nuclear warheads from Minot, North Dakota to Barksdale Air Force Base in Louisiana. Oops. Just better hope it doesn’t end up at the Unclaimed Baggage Center.

Courts: Entering an airport means you’re subject to searches
This is old news, but I admit I just got wind of it now. If you’re at an airport in the U.S., you can’t turn around and leave the premises if you want to avoid being searched. “Citing threats of terrorism, the court ruled passengers give up all rights to be free of warrantless searches once a ‘passenger places hand luggage on a conveyor belt for inspection’ or ‘passes though a magnetometer.’ [...] In 1973, the circuit court ruled that airport searches were valid ‘only if they recognize the right of a person to avoid search by electing not to board the aircraft.’” Not anymore. Offer to leave all you want, they can still search you. For the law-dogs out there, the case is United States v. Aukai, 04-10226. (via Wired’s Threat Level)

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eBay auction: Fly the A380 in its commercial debut
If you want to fly on the A380’s maiden commercial voyage with Singapore Airlines, and not just admire Lego miniature models (above), then eBay might have your ticket. Coming soon, a charity auction of tickets on the inaugural flight, with proceeds going to Community Chest of Singapore and Doctors Without Borders. When can you start bidding? That depends on Airbus: “The auction will take place a few weeks before the flight. SIA said that it would announce the launch date once it had a delivery date from Airbus for the plane.”

Westjet: No paper required
Canadian airline Westjet is eliminating the need for printouts of e-tickets. A copy of your ticket on your laptop or smartphone will do the trick. Might not work on US-Canada flights — the ID checker at American airports would likely still try to scrawl their initials on your LCD screen. (via TheAirlineHub)

Drunken pilots? So 1990s. But drunken astronauts?
“At least twice, astronauts were allowed to fly after flight surgeons and other astronauts warned they were so drunk they posed a flight-safety risk.” Be glad Virgin Galactic hasn’t launched.

Eos opens new lounge at Stansted
All-business Eos Airlines escalates the trans-Atlantic wars with a new lounge at London-Stansted.

Qantas introduces premium economy
Wider seats (19.5″), more legroom, legrests, better menu, laptop power, noise-canceling headsets, and a separate check-in line. If flying to Australia, and if you feel like paying about twice the price of coach (but half the price of business), then Qantas premium economy may be the ticket. Coming February 2008 on their Airbus A380s and Boeing 747s.

Time-waster: Statris!
Test your USA geography and your motor reflexes with Tetris-esque geo-fun! (via BoingBoing)

Arthur G. writes in:

The Airbus 380 looks amazing. How much will tickets cost?

This is actually quite a common question received here at Upgrade: Travel Better HQ. People are clearly awed by the size of the A380 — I was awed, too, when I saw it back in March. Others are wary of getting on a plane that big, especially in case of an emergency. (See the evacuation test video for a best-case scenario.)

But your question about prices can’t be answered, Arthur. While an airline’s equipment certainly affects its cost structure (and the A380 isn’t cost-effective on every route), the price of a plane ticket isn’t solely linked to the model of aircraft.

You probably wouldn’t ask, “How much will a flight on Boeing 737 cost?” After all, you can fly a Boeing 737 on Aloha Airlines from Honolulu to Kona, or on Continental from San Francisco to Newark, or even from Houston to Zurich in an all-business class configuration on Privatair. The price could be anywhere from $39 to $8000. The model of plane isn’t determining the fare.

So if you want to fly on the Airbus A380, your fare will depend on the route, the airline, the class of service, how far in advance you buy the ticket… not to mention that old standby, supply and demand. Just like every other flight.

Singapore Airlines will receive the first four A380s to roll off the assembly line, with expected delivery date in the fall of this year. The initial route will be London-Singapore-Sydney. Qantas will bring the behemoth to American shores on flights to Australia in 2008. Lufthansa will bring the ‘bus to New York thereafter, if all goes according to plan.

But the price of those flights? That depends.

Related:
- Airbus A380 at Chicago O’Hare
- Video: Airbus A380 evacuation test

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When free drinks aren’t welcome
Why would there be an uproar over an airline giving a customer a free bottle of wine? When that customer is a celebrity who just left rehab for alcoholism. A well-meaning Qantas flight attendant gave a bottle of red to singer Keith Urban, who apparently declined. But come on: give the flight attendant a break! Unless the airline is giving CIA-style background briefings about the passengers in the cabin, you can’t be expected to know the ins and outs of every celebrity’s (or every passenger’s) personal life. In fact, I was quite content to be blissfully unaware of Mr. Urban’s specific addiction before this imbroglio. (Thanks Dr. Vino!)

Group hug: Mergers and partnerships
JetBlue merging with Delta? Rumored, but unlikely. Brazil’s TAM and Germany’s Lufthansa? Not a merger, but a codesharing partnership. United is getting in on the hot codesharing action with TAM, too. Lufthansa also joined up with El Salvador’s TACA, already a United partner. Are the Star Alliance invitations far off? And keepin’ it Star, is Singapore Airlines buying China Eastern? They’re buying a piece, but how big will that piece be?…

Can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em?
British Airways, apparently in a response to the all-business class service from startups like Eos, Silverjet, and Maxjet, is considering rolling out all-premium service between unnamed European and American cities. Premium economy in the back, business in the front. No straight-up economy, and no first. (Thanks, Benet!)

Countdown to 7/8/07
Boeing has started assembling its first 787 Dreamliner, a plane manufactured in prefab pieces around the world and bolted together at the Everett factory. The debut is scheduled for July 8. 7/8/07… 787… har har har.

American updates website, makes it more like Southwest
American Airlines revamped their website, giving you an overview of the different fares you can book. The layout will be familiar, if you’ve ever booked on Southwest. Or Air Canada. Or Qantas. Or Ted. (Does anyone ever actually book tickets at the Ted site?)

Yapta comes alive!
Yapta, the service that tracks fares after you’ve bought, mentioned here last week, is now live.

Alaska Airlines downgrades their upgrades
If you used miles to upgrade flights on Alaska Airlines, you’ll have to buy far more expensive tickets in order to do so. Thumbs down. Gary Leff has the full scoop.