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Shameless self-promotional pimping alert!

The government of France’s tourist office is running a contest, and you and I can both win. As part of their promotion of tourism to the island of Martinique, they invited bloggers to offer up their “wildest, funniest, or most exciting travel or holiday experience.” I banged out a quick synopsis of some of my 1992 travels in Russia, a story which features me standing in a train wearing nothing but my underwear at 3 in the morning, with a pimply-faced Red Army recruit pushing the tip of his automatic rifle into my chest.

Hmm… what better way to win a trip to a Caribbean island than to discuss travel to Russia in February?…

Click here to stuff the ballot box read my entry. Click on the stars at the top of the entry to cast your ballot.

Giving it five stars is appreciated (hint hint), and voting enters you into a sweepstakes for free Martinique travel of your own. Here’s hoping it’s — literally — win-win.

Other blogger-participants have been pimping their stories for days — even weeks! (How fair is that?!) I was invited to participate late, so I’ve got some catching up to do. And that’s where you come in.

It’s not often that I ask for your help. In fact, when WAS the last time I asked for your help? But I’m asking now.

The terms of the contest are here. The whole array of stories to consider is here. And, as a gentle reminder (cough, cough) my contribution is here. Vote early and often! Just vote by February 28.

And thanks!

Upgraded: Your chance to vent at the TSA
Homeland Security first got a blog, but now the TSA has one too. And it’s not just staffed by the man at the top. They asked for your honest opinions. Give ‘em hell. Just keep it civil. (Thanks, Stephen!)

Upgraded: Nude Aviation
Who could forget Naked Air, the chartered “airline” that transported “naturists” to sunny destinations. Now, a German travel agency will make naked flights a regular option. But for those longing for a long overnight trip in the buff, you’ll have to keep waiting. It’s just a short trip within Germany. (Seriously, why bother?)

Upgraded: Business travel blogging
Hirsute frequent flyer kingpin Randy Petersen has gathered a number of blogs related to business travel into one place — BoardingArea.com — and you’ll find Upgrade: Travel Better syndicated there, too. You’ll find some familiar names there as well, plus some spunky newcomers. The site’s launch was featured in the New York Times, too, including a photo of the hirsute proprietor. Check it out.

Upgraded: Hotel thieves
If you’ve ever stolen stuff from a hotel room, you can return those towels, glasses, bathrobes, and … punch bowls? In any case, if you’ve been a pilferer from the Renaissance Mayflower Hotel, your day of amnesty is here. Bring back the contraband, no questions asked. (Thanks Dr. Vino!)

Upgraded: JetBlue’s alliance prospects
Perhaps you remember my prediction from February 6 last year, that jetBlue and Aer Lingus would try to sync up in an alliance? Looks like the prediction was right, according to WSJ reports. But Aer Lingus might find some competition from jetBlue shareholder Lufthansa, who is also looking into an alliance of sorts with the ‘blue.

Upgraded: Short runways, long flights, 2-year old sarcasm
British Airways has announced another luxury initiative, aimed squarely at its all-business class competitors. The new all-business class service will fly from London’s City airport — a tiny airport with a short runway — to an as-yet unnamed New York area airport. The flight will feature only 36 seats on an Airbus A318. Not A319. Not A320. A318. The shortest in the family, and the biggest plane legally permitted to depart from London-City. The Cranky Flier has a nice post on the logistics of the proposed service. But jeez, it looks like my sarcastic comments from April 2006 were taken seriously: “What’s next?: Will someone determine that London City airport needs nonstop business class service to White Plains or Islip?” I guess life imitates snark?

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Flight delayed? Sue!
A judge in India has ruled that passengers whose Go Air flight was canceled were due the equivalent of US$380 each because of the mental anguish they suffered. Is this a trend? Where can I sue for suffering through flight delays inside a regional jet?

Get on the bus
The American Bus Association wants you to feel green about hitting the road: They claim that buses — ahem, motorcoaches — are more environmentally friendly than passenger cars, trains, and planes. According to their numbers, a bus gets 184 passenger miles per gallon, while commuter rail comes in at 86 and planes only make 42. I’ve sat behind some black soot-spewing buses, and I find this claim hard to believe. And what about all the electric rail out there? Nonetheless, one thing is indisputable: Buses are more efficient than passenger cars.

Which airline has the healthiest snacks?
Domestically, it’s United and their $5 snackboxes according to Charles Stuart Platkin of dietdetective.com. See his post for the lowdown on the various airlines’ snacks.

Business class shootout!
Reader Gianugo has personally tested three of the all-business class airlines that cross the Atlantic. In his tests, Silverjet comes out on top, with L’Avion and Maxjet trailing. (No test of Eos Airlines, but they’re generally at a much higher price point.) The L’Avion review certainly jives with previous reports from the field (here and here). Read his detailed post for the breakdown of what makes these discounted business class airilnes tick.

No more being charged extra fees for returning your car with a full tank
Consumer victory! One of the very first posts on this blog — in its first week of inception, in fact — railed against Budget Rent-a-Car’s practice of levying a $9.50 charge if the odometer registered fewer than 75 miles upon return. This is one of those “what are they thinking” fees that gives the travel industry a bad name. I’m pleased to report that the Federal Trade Commission has clamped down and told Budget to stop. (via Consumerist)

Shameless self-promotion, part one
Chris Elliott, consumer advocate, National Geographic ombudsman, and general thorn in the travel industry’s side, compiled his list of the seven “most influential” travel bloggers. You’re reading one of them. Huzzah! The others: Paul Brady at Jaunted, Arthur Frommer, Holly Hegeman at PlaneBuzz, CondeNast’s Wendy Perrin, Ben Popken at Consumerist (where I’ve been a guest blogger on several occasions), and FareCompare’s Rick Seaney. Nice company to be in, to be sure, and a good starting point for your other blog-reading needs. There are seven runners-up, too, so go read the whole thing. Consider other blogs, like the Travvies winners from earlier this year. (Or heck, the finalists!) And peruse the blogroll in the pulldown in the right sidebar for more great blogs that I read regularly.

Shameless self-promotion, part deux
Upgrade: Travel Better goes audio: You can hear a few snippets of me commenting on recent frequent flyer mile devaluations on Marketplace, which aired this morning on public radio. If you didn’t wake up to the “dulcet tones” of my voice on your clock radio this morning, you can hear the clip and read the transcript here.

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With the Thanksgiving holiday upon us here in the U.S., the roads, rails, and skies are jam-packed with 39 million travelers. This year, I’m giving thanks that I’m not one of them. The U:TB home office will be taking the next few days off, to recover from the tryptophan low that excessive turkey consumption is bound to bring.

(Incidentally, in the spirit of the Gerald Ford flashback photo, the presidentially “pardoned” turkey nowadays flies to Disneyland or Disney World to live out its days at a petting zoo. And the bird flies… typically in first class. I’m not making this up.)

So for those who ARE traveling this holiday, good luck. The tips I posted a year ago for holiday travel are just as valid today, if not more so.

If you’re heading to one of the major airports, you might want to check Travelocity’s live-blogging from the terminals. Or test-drive Orbitz Traveler Update (look on the right side of the screen, under “Orbitz TLC,” to find it), for live passenger reports from the field (background here.)

But good luck, and a safe journey, no matter how you travel.

At the same time, let me take this opportunity to thank YOU, the readers of this site. Thanks for reading, thanks for commenting, thanks for e-mailing in your tips and questions, and thanks for making online travel-related purchases through the “support” page. I appreciate the time you spend on Upgrade: Travel Better, and I hope you’ll continue to point your browser (or feed reader) this way.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Many thanks to Tyler Colman, the world-traveling wino we know on the web as Dr. Vino, who sat in for over a week while the Upgrade: Travel Better headquarters moved from the Midwest to the Southeast.

Show Tyler your love and check out his site for bargain wine picks, news, and commentary on the wide world of fermented grape juice.

For those who sent e-mails, please rest assured that I’ll be getting to them soon, but it’ll take a few days to get through the backlog.

Onward!

Apologies for the delayed notice, but I’m in the process of moving, and posting has been difficult. But every trip means more material!

Next week, things should get closer to normal.

A teaser: Look forward to a report from my first stay at a Hyatt Place (the selectively-renovated, newly-rebranded, and otherwise unrecognizable second life of Amerisuites). Also: stories of how my wife and I ended up playing hotel housekeeper at 4:15 a.m., putting sheets on the bed in a room we had finally checked into. Good times!

In the interim, mega-thanks to guest poster Tyler Colman, a.k.a. Dr. Vino, for his live-from-France posts!

Ian at Brave New Traveler is running a contest for the funniest travel photos.

They can be pictures of you, or pictures taken by you, as long as they’re from your travels. The photo doesn’t even have to be that funny, as long as the story that goes with it is hi-freakin’-larious.

It’s a fun idea. I’m sure I can do better than this, but the cheesy travel photo supply is low on the laptop…

Most of my more amusing pictures are from pre-digital days, so my only offering (for now) is this image from my friend Barbara’s apartment in Amsterdam.

It’s not a picture of a collegiate me making an ass of myself sticking a finger into a Lenin bust’s nose in a Moscow subway station, but you work with what you’ve got.

Over at Benet Wilson’s blog at Aviation Daily, TSA Director Kip Hawley has a guest post on the subject of security screening of airport employees.

The post itself reads like a barely-relaxed press release, but it’s still good to see a government official coming out and joining the blogosphere like this. Baby steps!

Comments on the post are open. Like a new blogger, perhaps Kip will be hitting F5 repeatedly, hoping to see some new comments on his latest post. Why not head on over, leave a note, and give him something to read?

I’ve written a piece for the April 2007 issue of FastCompany on the expansion of boutique hotels (or “small luxury hotels,” as some prefer to be called) into mini-chains.

The article (or “charticle,” more accurately) covers the Gansevoort, Thompson, James, and Magnolia brands, each of which is expanding their model beyond their initial home base.

You’ll need a code from page 10 of the issue in order to access it online for the next few weeks. It’ll be freely available next month.

My contribution to the magazine last month, on changes and improvements to the experience of renting a car, is now accessible free to non-subscribers, by the way.

I’m guest-posting at Consumerist.com again this week, and early into next. (If you came here from Consumerist, howdy. Hope you’ll stick around here, too.) Thanks to Ben and Meg for having me back.

Yesterday’s travel-related highlight: passengers forced to relieve themselves in the barf bag because the airline prohibited use of the bathroom — because a lightbulb was out.

Today’s first offering: American Airlines skycaps in Miami, upset with the tip they received, fill a woman’s suitcase with trash. Delightful.

A reporter at a major publication is looking to find travelers who have missed flight connections. If you have a “misconnect” story, please use the contact form to drop me a line, with your contact information. I will pass it along to the reporter. Thanks.

I was guest blogging earlier today over at the Consumerist. Nice to be invited back ! (I had the pleasure of blogging there once before, back in September last year.) Thanks to Ben and Meg for letting me sit in.

Here’s are some of the posts that went up today. Many are related to travel. Shocking!

- Can’t Drive 55? Find Out Where to Slow Down
- Recharge Your Batteries For Free At Airports
- Will More Fuel Efficient Cars Lead To Cheaper Beer?
- Howto: Get Your Name Off The No-Fly List
- Point/Counterpoint: JetBlue’s Apology Isn’t Enough