Downgraded: Checking in your bags at US airports
You’ve mastered the self-service check-in. You’ve printed your own boarding passes. Now, get ready to tag your own checked bags: “American Airlines(AMR) and Air Canada say they’re in talks with the Transportation Security Administration for a trial program in Boston likely later this year to let travelers tag their own checked bags for the first time in the U.S. Delta Air Lines (DAL) says it’s in talks with TSA for a trial at another airport.” Not a huge deal, frankly, and 32 airlines worldwide have already been testing this for some time at airports around the world, but it’s new to the United States. It’s another transfer of responsibility from the airline to you. Don’t expect to receive any discounts, vouchers, or thank-yous for doing someone else’s job, either.

Upgraded: Inflight wi-fi on Southwest
Southwest is (finally) getting on the inflight wifi train (err, or plane…) and their price will be a relatively low $5 per connection, regardless of flight duration/distance or device used to connect.

Upgraded: Passion for AirTran’s first class seats
Fans of AirTran, which is being taken over by Southwest, have set up a website devoted to saving the first class seats that AirTran frequent fliers have grown accustomed to. Join the resistance at AirTranSOS.com.

Upgraded: Your cellphone as a key
The Clarion Hotel in Stockholm is the first hotel to install a cellphone-based room lock/key system. It’s a limited rollout, for starters. In theory, you’ll be able to check in by phone and walk straight to your room, bypassing the front desk, and avoiding the need for a room key. Neat, if it works.

Upgraded: Back-channel efforts to change our security theater
If existing efforts to change TSA policy have failed — and if the policy itself has continuously gotten worse for travelers — then perhaps a back-channel effort to effect change may be in order. Reader Ed sends in this open letter to the CEO of the Walt Disney Company. The letter-writer, Arthur Krolman, argues that Disney is tacitly endorsing TSA policy, and is thereby supporting the “nude photography or inspection of private parts” of children. Ouch. Will Disney take the bait ?…

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It’s November 1, 2010, and the TSA’s Secure Flight rules are now fully in effect. But the requirement that you provide your gender, birthdate, and precise name on your ID is nowhere near as notable as the TSA’s increased insistance on getting intimately familiar with your private parts.

Jeffrey Goldberg gets the lowdown. And I mean low down.

In part because of the back-scatter imager’s invasiveness (a TSA employee in Miami was arrested recently after he physically assaulted a colleague who had mocked his modestly sized penis, which was fully apparent in a captured back-scatter image), the TSA is allowing passengers to opt-out of the back-scatter and choose instead a pat-down. I’ve complained about TSA pat-downs in the past, because they, too, were more security theater than anything else. They are, as I would learn, becoming more serious, as well.

“[...] starting tomorrow, we’re going to start searching your crotchal area” — this is the word he used, “crotchal” — and you’re not going to like it.”

“What am I not going to like?” I asked.

“We have to search up your thighs and between your legs until we meet resistance,” he explained.

“Resistance?” I asked.

“Your testicles,” he explained.

“That’s funny,” I said, “because ‘The Resistance’ is the actual name I’ve given to my testicles.”

Go read the whole thing. And the sequel. Then you can make a more informed decision as to whether or not to opt out of the backscatter.

Upgraded: Free rental cars for electric vehicle owners
If you live outside the United States and spring for a Nissan Leaf, the forthcoming mass-production battery electric vehicle, Nissan will cover your car rentals for long-distance travels. This is interesting. The Leaf only covers 100 miles or so on a single charge, so it’s not necessarily practical for road trips. Nissan’s offer bridges that gap. For now, though, it’s not available to customers in the U.S. No details yet on frequency of rental, distances covered, or other limitations.

Upgraded: Canada’s Via Rail
Via, the Canadian national railway, is updating its cars, with the first new-and-improved sleeping cars and dining cars going into service between Toronto and Vancouver. More comfort on long-haul trains is always a plus.

Upgraded: Your ears
Your ears may soon be a part of your security screening. You read that right: Ears are a biologically unique marker, and as such, may be included in your biometric profile for international travel. If researchers at the University of Southampton in the UK convince global governments, you too, may soon be identified at passport control by way of your ears. (via @elliottdotorg)

Upgraded: Burnin’ rubber
Reader Jeff sends in a video of an Airbus A340-600 brake test. It’s not quite riveting at first, but in the second half of the video, overheated brakes and tires start blowing up, catching on fire, and creating general havoc. I’m not sure if the video is comforting or not. On the one hand, there’s a lot of time between the time the time the brakes are hit and the time the flames start spewing out, meaning there’s a lot of time to evacuate. On the other hand, what the hell are these Airbus staffers doing!? The repeated expressions of “Merde!” aren’t exactly the sign of a plan coming together:

(Thanks Jeff! via the Presurfer)

Some encouraging news for those who like to travel with liquids and gels in quantities greater than 3 ounces/100 ml in carry-on luggage: The International Civil Aviation Organization has predicted an end to the restrictions within the next two years.

“In the next two years (the ban) will end,” ICAO Secretary General Raymond Benjamin told AFP ahead of the UN organization’s 37th general assembly, which kicks off in Montreal on Tuesday.

New equipment capable of detecting explosives in water bottles, makeup kits or toothpaste tubes, for example, would be installed at most airport security checkpoints by 2012, he explained.

This timeframe is more aggressive than the timeline the European Union has set for the lifting of the ban, the very-specific date of April 29, 2013:

By 29 April 2013 at the latest, all liquids will be allowed in cabin baggage and will be screened. By that date, the current restrictions on the carriage of liquids in cabin baggage will end. The transition period until 2013 is necessary to allow for a roll-out of liquids screening equipment at all EU airports.

As a preliminary step in phasing out the restrictions on liquids, as from 29 April 2011 at the latest, duty-free liquids purchased at third country airports or on board third country airlines and carried in tamper evident bags will be allowed as cabin baggage and will be screened. Today, these liquids are only allowed in cabin baggage if they come from selected third countries (United States, Canada, Singapore and Croatia).

Unfortunately, it will apparently take a little more convincing (or lobbying) to get the DHS and TSA on board with that timetable:

[U.S. Homeland Security Secretary Janet] Napolitano told The Associated Press she’s surprised by International Civil Aviation Organization Secretary General Raymond Benjamin’s remarks that security equipment in most airports will allow for the ban to be lifted soon.

Napolitano said the technology isn’t ready.

“I think that’s premature,” Napolitano said in an interview with The Associated Press.

Sigh. It feels like we’ve made so little progress in the world since 2006. Back in 2008, there were liquid bomb testers in Japanese airports, and we still don’t see them in the US or Europe.

However, the fact that the ICAO is publicly making statements pertaining to a timeline for phase-out is strangely encouraging. I know the ICAO has no jurisdiction over the screening of passengers at airports, but the transportation and security leaders of forty governments attended their last conference. This isn’t a bunch of crackpots, and the leaders didn’t fall off the turnip truck.

Let’s revisit this in two years, to see if we’re really any closer to lifting the ban. Until then, continue using your 3-1-1 freedom baggies.

Remember Clear, the company that promised faster trips through select airports’ security in exchange a background check, your biometric data, and around $200 a year? It, and several of its competitors, went bankrupt in summer 2009, stranding about 200,000 passengers who had prepaid for memberships that were worthless overnight. Well: They’re baaaaaaaack.

So far, two firms are getting into the Registered Traveler game:

• the derivatively-named Alclear, which purchased the assets of the original Verified Identity Pass/Clear out of bankruptcy, including the Clear website. There are no locations yet.
• iQueue, which has beaten Alclear to the punch by actually launching its first location — at the Indianapolis Airport.

If you were a Clear member before, the remaining time on your membership will be restored under (al)Clear. If you join iQueue (which costs $149/year), former Clear members get 6 months free.

iQueue is trying to sweeten the deal by proposing value-added services, beyond airport security, as a benefit:

including preferred parking, airport club access and airport retail discounts as well as local restaurant, golf, spa, tennis, health club, mortgage and auto lease/purchase discounts. A future iQueue Platinum Membership level will also include identity theft protection and enhanced travel insurance as well as worldwide travel assistance, medical services, lounge access and concierge services.

The devil is in the details — club access may be promising — but I’m not sure these benefits are worth the price of admission. It almost like they’re throwing in an Entertainment book. Big deal.

I was never a fan of this the first time around. I’m still not. Yes, airport security sucks, but the market niche that this appeals to is so narrow: Travelers who would be willing to pay for a shorter line tend to be frequent fliers. And those frequent fliers are likely be elite members of their frequent flier program, which, in turn, would grant them access to shorter lines at major airports.

The availability of these lines at airports isn’t impressive, either. At this point, though it’s admittedly really early in the rebirth, it’s all about Indianapolis. (Really??) At its pre-bankruptcy heyday, Clear had 18 cities. Hardly comprehensive, either.

It was a concept without a core customer base when it launched the first time. It appears it’s still that way.

Your mileage may vary, of course, and if you’re a fan of Clear, I’d love to hear about it, but speaking for myself, I won’t be spending any money on either of these programs.

Related:
- Clear / Verified Identity Pass shuts down
- Do airlines’ most frequent flyers deserve shorter security lines?
- Would you pay a fee to reserve a time to pass through airport security?

Downgraded: Consumer smarts
You will no doubt recall Spirit Airlines’ decision to charge up to $45 for a carry-on bag. What may surprise (and disappoint) you: The airline has seen a surge in bookings, 50% higher than the same period last year. The airline admits to capitalizing on the media attention, much of it negative. Perhaps all press is good press, after all. Or perhaps passengers are suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.

Downgraded: Hotel Fees Running Wild
Bjorn Hanson of NYU predicts an increase in the size, variety, and breadth of hotel fees in the coming year. $1.7 billion worth. And if you were curious as to how you’ll be charged, here’s a list:

Examples of fees and surcharges include: resort or amenity fees, early departure fees, reservation cancellation fees, internet fees, telephone call surcharges, the costs of local calls, business center fees (i.e. cost of sending/receiving faxes and sending/receiving overnight packages), room service delivery surcharges, mini-bar restocking fees, charges for in-room safes, and automatic gratuities and surcharges. For groups, there have been increased charges for bartenders, service, and other staff at events; charges for set up and breakdown of meeting rooms; charges for meeting rooms in which meals are served (the common practice has been that there is a charge for meeting rooms but not an additional room charge for rooms in which meals are served); fees for master folio billing and baggage holding fees for guests leaving luggage with bell staff after checking out of a hotel but before departure.

Downgraded: Scanner privacy
Oh good: The full-body scanners that supposedly blur out the private parts, don’t. Thanks to The Smoking Gun, we learn of a TSA employee who walked through the scanner and was, ahem, judged by his colleagues for the size of his manhood. Eventually, the guy snapped at the mockery, which led to his arrest. And led to our awareness of just how personal the scanners can get…

Downgraded: The Tonga Room
There just aren’t enough kitsch-tastic tiki lounges left in America. And so it saddens me when I read that the San Francisco Fairmont is planning to demolish the Tonga Room, a Polynesian-themed bar that was launched in 1945. The city (and some preservationists) are protesting the planned demolition.

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