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Give a warm welcome to guest poster Ben Curtis, who spends half of every year traveling. Ben leads tours for Rick Steves, gives culture and history lectures onboard cruise ships, and recently started putting his passion for the Adriatic, one of his favorite destinations, into blog form at adriaticfanatic.com.

Today, Ben offers some feedback from his recent flight onboard Singapore Airlines’ super-behemoth Airbus A380.

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The A380 is changing passenger air travel as we know it. Once you’ve flown in it, you are forever changed. It’s a revelation, nothing less.

Or so the hype would have it. My reaction, having flown Singapore Airlines’ route between Sydney and Singapore back in December? It’s just a plane. A ridiculously well-hyped plane.

Boarding and disembarking however many hundred passengers proceeded very smoothly and quickly. But don’t expect to get a peek at the high life. Those flying in cattle class like me can’t even get a peek at infamous suites; they are totally cordoned off from the hoi polloi.

The overhead comparments are spacious, but when they’re down it’s very easy to bonk your head on them.

I was on the lower deck, in the back not far from the stairs to the upper level. If you fly the A380 and in you’re in economy, try to get a seat on the upper level. There are fewer people up there so it’s just a bit more “intimate,” if you will.

Also towards the rear of the plane there was a relatively decent-sized area by the galley for standing and stretching. The drawback is that if you’re seated way back in economy, the WC doors open right into this standing area and I found that people had a habit of opening the door before the toilets were finished flushing. That means noise.

The seats were comfortable enough, and Singapore Airlines’ entertainment system is the best I’ve ever encountered. There are noticeable air vents all along the ceiling in coach class, so I’m hoping that translates to better air circulation. I also did enjoy the simulated dawn lighting effects as we got closer to Sydney–but other newer planes have that as well.

All in all, it’s a plane. Probably not going to change your life. Unless perhaps you’re fortunate enough to be in a suite…

— Ben Curtis

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Downgraded: The mile-high club
Singapore Airlines has some of the swankest first class seats — ahem, “suites” — in the sky, but if you want to get frisky with your mate at 39,000 feet, no dice. Despite having a double bed in their suites, the airline enforces a no-sex policy in the sky. Note the key word: enforces. Early passengers on the A380 weren’t pleased:

“So they’ll sell you a double bed, and give you privacy and endless champagne — and then say you can’t do what comes naturally?” asked Tony Elwood, a vigorous 76. “Seems a bit strange.”

Sorry, Tony. Your ticket may say first class, but you and the missus will have to use the lavatory, just like everyone else. Or rent a private love jet for $299.

Downgraded: Airbus’ green claims
One big selling point for modern aircraft is always their lower fuel consumption. Leo Hickman at the Guardian ran the numbers on the A380, and found that Airbus’ calculations are bogus. They assume a full plane of 555 passengers, but zero luggage or cargo, when they calculate the kerosene burn. How realistic. (By the way, Airbus claims that the A380 will burn 2.9 liters of fuel per passenger for every 100km traveled, i.e., 75 grams of carbon dioxide per passenger per km.)

Upgraded: Olde tyme hotel rates
The Palmer House in Chicago is allowing repeat guests to stay there at the rate they paid years ago. A great deal… as long as the earlier stay was fifty years ago or more, and if the guests still have the original receipt. A 1947 receipt will get you a room under $10. Which wasn’t cheap! (Notice to my wife: THIS is why I keep receipts.)

Downgraded: The State Department
Turns out that the $97 passport fee is nicely padded in the government’s favor, far above the cost of processing. Gosh, really?

Downgraded: Surcharges
The seven most annoying travel surcharges, from Chris Elliott. Room service “Tray fee”?? Wow, that’s really brazen.

Downgraded: The TSA
TSA regularly sends staff to conduct internal testing of its security procedures. But it turns out they’re sometimes tipping off the front-line staff in advance. (I know someone who works for TSA, who has had the pleasure of carrying a “bomb” through the airport. Yes, they caught him. Who’da thunk.)

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Yes, I’m asleep, but yes I am happy to see you
The spectre of naked sleepwalking businessmen is haunting Europe. UK-based Travelodge reports a seven-fold increase in the number of cases of sleepwalkers, usually male, often in the buff. It’s become so much of a problem, the hotel chain has started issuing pamphlets to franchisees, giving guidance on how to handle a sleepwalker. “Have towels ready” in case of embarrassing nudity. Noted.

Sioux City, Iowa ROX
Sioux City’s three-letter airport code is rather unfortunate: SUX. But after years of objecting to code, and after considering the alternatives offered by the FAA (GWU, GYO, GYT, SGV and GAY), the city has decided to embrace the code. Paging Hubwear to create the appropriate t-shirts! (Thanks, Will!)

Meet the buyer of the world’s most expensive ticket
So the Airbus A380 took its first commercial flight, with all seats sold by Singapore Airlines as part of a charity auction. The winning bid for the pair of 1st class suite seats went to the fresh-faced 38-year old Julian Hayward of the UK, who spent roughly US$100,000 for the pair. Ouch. At least it was for a good cause, I guess.

Who knew commuter airlines flew to space?
Rocketplane, one of the companies hoping to bring suborbital space travel to the masses, is redesigning their spaceship. You might not know what weightlessness feels like, but the experience of the flight might seem all too familiar: In lieu of a refitted Learjet (!), they’re creating a new design, which looks astonishingly like a regional jet. I hope the legroom is better.

The movie seemed so nice, why is the guy in the uniform so unfriendly?
Nearly a year ago, the U.S. government commissioned Disney to help revamp the image of the United States as a travel destination. Thanks to the post-9/11 paranoia-driven fingerprinting, slow visa approvals, and the perpetually incomprehensible line “managers” and gruff INS agents at airports across the country, the reputation of flying to (or, heaven forbid, transiting through) the U.S. has been in the cellar. Disney’s first visible change: A seven-minute movie, depicting the diversity of American culture. Fine, and good. But until you train the passport checker in a little customer service, you’re still a long way away from people calling the U.S. a friendly place to enter.

Upgraded: Hotel executives’ waste of shareholder funds
Hotel corporation annual meetings rarely reach the level of sublime self-indulgence, but InterContinental has raised the bar:

[InterContinental Hotels Group] Americas’ President Steve Porter kicked off [IHG’s national meeting] with the gusto of a rock star, directing a choir singing Queen’s “We Will Rock You.” A band, including CEO Cosslett on guitar, provided the thunderous chords while drummers drilled the song into the rafters of the Dallas Convention Center.

“Today we are at a crossroads,” Porter said. “Our relevance is at risk.”

Clearly, true. For real relevance, Porter would have conducted the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and London Symphony Orchestra in a complete performance of the Who’s “Tommy,” while discussing the prospects for expansion of the Hotel Indigo brand.

Upgraded: Airport health care
Why visit a doctor — or heck, a supermarket — when you can get your flu shots at the airport? Now injecting at gate C17!

Downgraded: New England fall foliage
One year’s weather or global warming? Either way, fall foliage in the northeast U.S. isn’t looking so great.

Upgraded: Eos adds more all-business flights
Eos Airlines, which currently flies from JFK to London-Stansted is expanding. New routes will include Newark to Stansted in the spring, and JFK to Paris in the fall.

Upgraded: Skybus adds flights from Greensboro
Late last month, I posted about Skybus‘ plans to expand to a new hub — or “focus city,” if you must use the proper nomenclature. Signs were pointing toward Greensboro, NC or Portsmouth, NH. Greensboro it is. Up to 11 flights a day coming soon.

Upgraded: A380 cinema verité
Video of the interior of the new Singapore Airbus A380. It’s pure, unadulterated Singapore Airlines and Airbus PR video. But it’s actually often rather unflattering, if you ask me, at least in coach. (Legroom looks good, but those colors are drab!) For those seeking some first class airline porn, voila.

(Thanks to reader Chris!)

Airbus officially delivered its first A380 superjumbo to Singapore Airlines today. It’s been a bit of a wait — nearly two years past schedule — but it’s quite an aviation milestone, no matter how delayed.

The first official flight with passengers will be between Singapore and Sydney on October 25, so we’ll see more PR fanfare when that date approaches, I’m sure.

The timing of the A380’s official delivery nearly coincides with Boeing’s recently-announced six-month delay to its 787 Dreamliner delivery. After several years of trouble, it’s Airbus’ turn to bask in the warm glow of positive press for a while.

I saw the A380 when it made a pit stop at Chicago O’Hare in March 2007, and it was impressive. A behemoth, just absurdly large next to other planes. I laughed as an MD-80 shuttled past it, like a chihuahua standing next to a great dane.

In light of the Airbus debutante ball, enjoy this time-lapse video of an A380 being constructed.

Related:
- Video: Airbus A380 evacuation test
- Reader mail: How much will tickets on the Airbus A380 cost?
- Video: Airbus A380 landing in fierce crosswinds
- Airbus A380 at Chicago O’Hare
- Singapore Airlines ups the ante for business and first class travel — big time

Upgraded and Downgraded: Virgin America to add inflight wireless internet …and voice
Virgin America will feature inflight wireless internet access on its planes, by working with AirCell (the same company that will roll out inflight wireless on American Airlines’ 767s). Jaunted reports that some unnamed features will be free, too.

Great, right? Well… there’s a catch. Skype is on the list of planned features. Hell is your seatmate shouting, “Guess where I am! No, guess! I’m on a plane!” Screaming madmen yelling at jilted lovers in faraway places could soon be sitting right next to you, laptops open, vocal cords ablaze. Bring the earplugs!

Upgraded: Singapore Airlines reveals its surprisingly spacious A380 layout
The Airbus A380, when packed to the gills with nothing but economy seats, could carry as many as 853 people. The normal three-class provision is estimated at 555 seats. But Singapore’s layout will only feature 471 seats, thanks largely to a boatload of extra-wide business class seats, much like the ones pictured here. To get a glimpse of the seatmap, Click here. Note that the economy class seats on the lower level are configured 3-4-3 and the upper level has them at 2-4-2.

Upgraded: The UK’s Travelodge
Downgraded: Home
An elderly British couple has been living in a Travelodge motel room for over twenty years. Talk about extended stay! Travelodge in the UK is not the same company as in the US. I’ve never stayed in the UK variant, but for their sake, I hope it’s better than the stateside chain. (via BoingBoing)

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Next thing to worry about in flight: Ozone
Like “sick building syndrome,” you can now start worrying about the plane’s air. But not because of the germs. It’s the ozone. Not holes in the ozone layer, either, but ozone levels in the cabin. Most interestingly, narrow-body flights are more prone than wide-body planes to higher ozone levels. Yet another reason to love the jumbos.

Korean Air shows off its Airbus A380 interiors
Singapore Airlines may be the first airline to fly the A380 mega-uber-hyper-super-jumbo-jet (and tickets are finally on sale for Sydney-Singapore flights, which start October 25, by the way), but you can get a photo tour of Korean Air’s A380. Lavender??! Who’s their interior designer? Yuck! (Thanks, Jeff!)

First class fare sale… if you’re traveling tomorrow
I know that airlines like to put out the e-fares and net-savers for weekend travel, but this offer from United struck me as odd. First class fares are on sale for travel on Saturday, September 15 only. Fly there in first, fly back in coach, savor the difference? Fares are less than regular paid first, but the bulk of fares are for really short flights where paying cash money for first class is bonkers.

Business class fare sales to Europe
All-business class L’Avion is flying Newark to Paris for $1398 roundtrip, pre-tax. Maxjet is doing London to New York or DC for $998, also roundtrip, also pre-tax. Both are through the end of 2007, but not every date may be available. (Thanks, Michelle!)

More dangerous shirts
I don’t know what to make of this. “Your liver is evil. It must be punished.” Har har har. But Continental Airlines wasn’t laughing when they kept Edna and Frank Taylor from getting onboard, because of that shirt. What’s with this “What Not to Wear” airline trend?

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Whom or what would they kill to get an upgrade?
Nepal Airlines mechanics sacrificed two goats to appease Akash Bhairab, the Hindu sky god, after they just couldn’t quite fix the problems in their Boeing 757. How many goats does it take to get a 757 to arrive on time at LAX? Slaughtering livestock isn’t limited to Himalayan aviation: Longtime readers may recall that Turkish Airlines maintenance workers killed a camel to celebrate the disposal of a regional jet last year.

$100K isn’t a good flight value
I know it was for charity. But paying $100,000 to fly on the inaugural Airbus A380 flight on Singapore Airlines seems a bit much. Most importantly, will they earn miles?

Shocker: Motel 6 really won’t leave the light on for you
To conserve energy, the ultra-budget chain doesn’t really leave lights on. So says their folksy pitchman Tom Bodett. So you know it’s true.

Delta’s apparently not afraid of the competition
Inside baseball, maybe, but still: Looking over the blogroll at Delta’s blog, I noticed that they link to their competitors: Southwest’s blog. That’s pretty gutsy for a corporate blog!

United names dates and planes for new business class rollout
The first plane to receive the long-awaited upgrade of 180-degree lie-flat seats in the business class cabin: a Boeing 767. It’s scheduled to travel between Washington and Frankfurt on October 29, 2007. Saver awards are unavailable at press time.

US Air Force tags nuclear warheads to wrong airport
Next time your luggage heads to Ketchikan, Alaska instead of Kansas City, take heart: The Air Force does it too. A B-52 bomber mistakenly carried six nuclear warheads from Minot, North Dakota to Barksdale Air Force Base in Louisiana. Oops. Just better hope it doesn’t end up at the Unclaimed Baggage Center.

Courts: Entering an airport means you’re subject to searches
This is old news, but I admit I just got wind of it now. If you’re at an airport in the U.S., you can’t turn around and leave the premises if you want to avoid being searched. “Citing threats of terrorism, the court ruled passengers give up all rights to be free of warrantless searches once a ‘passenger places hand luggage on a conveyor belt for inspection’ or ‘passes though a magnetometer.’ […] In 1973, the circuit court ruled that airport searches were valid ‘only if they recognize the right of a person to avoid search by electing not to board the aircraft.’” Not anymore. Offer to leave all you want, they can still search you. For the law-dogs out there, the case is United States v. Aukai, 04-10226. (via Wired’s Threat Level)

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Videos like this clip of the hulking Airbus A380 landing safely after approaching the runway in crosswinds — practically flying in sideways — make me feel just that little smidgen safer. When I’m getting onboard a flying hunk of metal jammed full with suitcases and sweaty humanity, it’s good to know that the plane can land even under these conditions. It just gives me the warm fuzzies. Those fuzzies would probably go away rapidly, once the pilot announces that our gate won’t be ready for an hour, and the toilets are backed up. But let’s keep it positive for now, ooh-ing and ahh-ing at the giant plane doing the stunts.

The video shows the Airbus A380 undergoing crosswind testing in Iceland. (Enjoy the Icelandic newscaster’s overdubbing!) For those folks who demand a Boeing equivalent, scroll to the bottom of this post for an equally impressive video from Boeing crosswind tests.

Related:
- Video: Airbus A380 evacuation test
- Airbus A380 at Chicago O’Hare

Upgraded, finally: Lufthansa economy-class entertainment
Lufthansa’s calculus has always seemed to be, “Should we give placate people in economy class with decent in-seat entertainment, or should we liquor them up for free? Let’s go with the liquor!” (Other airlines, say, Virgin Atlantic, have managed to do both, but let’s set that aside…) They’re finally reconsidering the entertainment options, if only on three routes. Still: Thank the heavens. My favorite real-world example of bad Lufthansa inflight video, broadcast on those overhead screens: A decade-old episode of the German crime drama “Derrick,” with an episode title that translated to “Rose on a Dump.” I’m not making this up. (Couldn’t they have shown the episode “Pornocchio” instead?)

Upgraded: Airbus A380 delivery dates
Singapore Airlines, the first airline to take delivery of its Airbus A380 mega-jumbo, is officially taking delivery of the plane on October 15, 2007. The first flight, from Singapore to Sydney, is scheduled for October 25.

Downgraded: The real Virgin America story
Virgin America knows how to play the PR game. No news there. But when the chips are down, they still need to figure out their schedule and customer service. But hey, the entertainment is decent. Mark Johnson of Jaunted flew a PR-free flight with Virgin America last week, and has the full report.

Downgraded: Charlotte security
Upgraded: Charlotte’s ability to bounce back
Charlotte Airport TSA agents let someone through security without screening. Flights delayed, passengers inconvenienced, etc., etc. But one thing I can tell you: The delays weren’t long-lasting. Later that same day, I caught a flight from Charlotte to LaGuardia, and it was all fine.

Downgraded: Hotel bathroom amenities
The China recalls keep rolling in. And now, hotel amenities are due for the seemingly inevitable report of poison. Gilchrist and Soames toothpaste is conveniently flavored with antifreeze. (I’ve seen G&C products, but never their toothpaste. My loss.) Better check that bag or box of mini-soaps, shampoos, etc. that the frequent traveler inevitably has stashed in their home. Toss the ‘paste.

Downgraded: Bellsouth/AT&T
It’s hard to blog without an internet connection. The BellSouth idiots first mistakenly shut down our dial tone but kept the DSL running. We called for service. They came, turned on dial tone, and shut down the DSL. Thanks. Great. Not once — not once — has BellSouth (now merged and rebranded AT&T) gotten one thing right on this phone line on the first try.

eBay auction: Fly the A380 in its commercial debut
If you want to fly on the A380’s maiden commercial voyage with Singapore Airlines, and not just admire Lego miniature models (above), then eBay might have your ticket. Coming soon, a charity auction of tickets on the inaugural flight, with proceeds going to Community Chest of Singapore and Doctors Without Borders. When can you start bidding? That depends on Airbus: “The auction will take place a few weeks before the flight. SIA said that it would announce the launch date once it had a delivery date from Airbus for the plane.”

Westjet: No paper required
Canadian airline Westjet is eliminating the need for printouts of e-tickets. A copy of your ticket on your laptop or smartphone will do the trick. Might not work on US-Canada flights — the ID checker at American airports would likely still try to scrawl their initials on your LCD screen. (via TheAirlineHub)

Drunken pilots? So 1990s. But drunken astronauts?
“At least twice, astronauts were allowed to fly after flight surgeons and other astronauts warned they were so drunk they posed a flight-safety risk.” Be glad Virgin Galactic hasn’t launched.

Eos opens new lounge at Stansted
All-business Eos Airlines escalates the trans-Atlantic wars with a new lounge at London-Stansted.

Qantas introduces premium economy
Wider seats (19.5″), more legroom, legrests, better menu, laptop power, noise-canceling headsets, and a separate check-in line. If flying to Australia, and if you feel like paying about twice the price of coach (but half the price of business), then Qantas premium economy may be the ticket. Coming February 2008 on their Airbus A380s and Boeing 747s.

Time-waster: Statris!
Test your USA geography and your motor reflexes with Tetris-esque geo-fun! (via BoingBoing)

Arthur G. writes in:

The Airbus 380 looks amazing. How much will tickets cost?

This is actually quite a common question received here at Upgrade: Travel Better HQ. People are clearly awed by the size of the A380 — I was awed, too, when I saw it back in March. Others are wary of getting on a plane that big, especially in case of an emergency. (See the evacuation test video for a best-case scenario.)

But your question about prices can’t be answered, Arthur. While an airline’s equipment certainly affects its cost structure (and the A380 isn’t cost-effective on every route), the price of a plane ticket isn’t solely linked to the model of aircraft.

You probably wouldn’t ask, “How much will a flight on Boeing 737 cost?” After all, you can fly a Boeing 737 on Aloha Airlines from Honolulu to Kona, or on Continental from San Francisco to Newark, or even from Houston to Zurich in an all-business class configuration on Privatair. The price could be anywhere from $39 to $8000. The model of plane isn’t determining the fare.

So if you want to fly on the Airbus A380, your fare will depend on the route, the airline, the class of service, how far in advance you buy the ticket… not to mention that old standby, supply and demand. Just like every other flight.

Singapore Airlines will receive the first four A380s to roll off the assembly line, with expected delivery date in the fall of this year. The initial route will be London-Singapore-Sydney. Qantas will bring the behemoth to American shores on flights to Australia in 2008. Lufthansa will bring the ‘bus to New York thereafter, if all goes according to plan.

But the price of those flights? That depends.

Related:
- Airbus A380 at Chicago O’Hare
- Video: Airbus A380 evacuation test
- Singapore Airlines (aff)

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