Domestic first class (in the United States) and international first class are simply not in the same analytical category. One offers a little more room with marginally better recline and a potential hot meal. The other typically features a fully-lie flat bed, privacy screens, a wide range of entertainment, and an extensive menu of food or drinks. And while the decline of the domestic first class experience has been well-documented, it’s not the greatest loss in the world; after all, if you can’t sip champagne on that flight from Houston to St. Louis, you’ll still live to fly another day.

But anyone who has sat in both seats, or heck, even read extensively about how the products differ, can attest to the fact that international first class, especially on an airline that really cares about the customer experience, is a completely different animal.

So I was disappointed to open my hotel room door yesterday morning, find the obligatory copy of USA Today, and read Roger Yu’s article lumping the two products into the same basket. Normally, USA Today’s travel coverage is top notch. So while I take no pleasure in calling them out, it’s important to call ‘em like I see ‘em.

The article begins with a claim about the decline of the front of the plane:

A small but growing list of airlines are eliminating or reducing rows in the most expensive part of their aircraft as customers increasingly look for cheaper seats.

Eliminating! Who is cutting the “$15,000 seats” — the article’s terminology, not mine … ? The article’s first answer: AirTran. AirTran? This, assuming that the merger with Southwest will go through. But AirTran does not sell flat-beds. Their “business class” seats are fairly typical domestic-American first-class seats. Wider leather seats with slightly more recline than coach. 37 inches of seat pitch, vs. 30 in coach. (Whoo.)

I could compare that to a truly top-notch first-class product like, say, Emirates’ personal first class suites on the A380, each with a sliding door for privacy. But that might be construed as unfair. So how about, American Airlines’ international first class product on their 777s: Instead of 37″ of pitch, they’ve got 92″. 92 vs 37? No contest!

It is simply not sensible to discuss domestic and international first class in the same article. Especially when the only evidence of a decline in domestic first class is a potential merger of two discount carriers.

The remainder of the article focuses on the legitimate reduction of first class in 3- or 4-class configurations. (Economy/Business/First or Economy/Premium Economy/Business/First). And indeed, airlines are slowly but surely phasing out first class seats in favor of (improved) business class seats.

And this comes as no surprise. Airlines have sunk r&d money into improving business class, and we’ve seen the results. Ten years ago, cradle seats were the norm on international business class. Now, the norm is flat beds, which were once just the domain of first class.

Except, of course, on domestic flights. Someone alert USA Today.

Upgraded: Our understanding of why airline food sucks
Until now, I’ve always thought the dry cabin air, high salt content, and reheated-ness would have been the primary reasons for the typically underwhelming flavor in inflght meals, but apparently we should also take into account the level of background noise. The low rumble of flight apparently dulls the senses. If true, then, we should be able to test this scientifically. Taste-test the same food with noise-canceling headphones, and then without. Or taste it at the front of an MD-80, then again in the back, right next to the jets. (Maybe this is why food seems better in first class…)

Downgraded: Amex Platinum benefits
As readers have reminded me: Starting September 2011, American Express Platinum cards will no longer give you free access to Continental President’s Club airport lounges. (I thought I had blogged about this in the past, but a quick search proves that memory was fuzzy: I hadn’t actually posted about it, just written about it briefly in the comments to a post about American Airlines Admirals Clubs launching free drinks domestically.) With Continental cutting access to Amex members, I assume this means that United won’t be scrambling to join up, either…

Downgraded: Air marshals from first class
It’s historically been easy to spot the air marshal onboard a flight: The guy with the short hair in an aisle seat in the last row of first class. Maybe not much longer. “Airlines are asking the Federal Air Marshals Service to relax its policy of often seating undercover agents in first class because they say it has become a costly disruption that isn’t justified by current security threats.” Looks like your upgrade chances might improve!

Upgraded: The love of flying
Some people love flying. Really, really love it. Love it enough to build their own airplane in their backyard, even though they never had aerospace engineering training. While I fear for the test flight, I admire this gentleman’s moxie and truly wish him the best of luck.

Jessica from the Smithsonian Institution sends in this short video about the museum’s Feather Identification Lab, which analyzes the detritus left over after an aircraft bird strike.

The video also taught me a new word: Snarge. (The aforementioned remnants of dead bird on aircraft parts.)

One warning: The image of dozens and dozens of drawers filled with taxidermed birds (starting at 0:38) may make you rather sad.

Sheraton and Westin, both within the Starwood stable of brands, are redesigning their guest rooms. But not every hotel will see the new rooms: The designs will roll out to their new constructions and rehabs starting in 2011.

Each chain will offer two options, each rich in interior design verbiage:

Newly-updated Sheratons will be either “Revival” (“inspired by the Regency Revival of the early 20th century… furniture profiles have curved corners and textiles have curved interlocking patterns – all of which are complemented by the design’s rich color palette of camel and tan with accents of plum and black”) or “Heritage” (“inspired by the historic Regency period of the late 18th and early 19th century, when Thomas Sheraton created timeless furniture designs that are still used in interiors today… Notched arch details are featured in most furnishings and complemented by geometric patterns in the room’s textiles and carpets”). The photo above is an example of a Sheraton room. I can’t really discern whether it’s “Revival” or “Heritage.” Place your wagers.

The Westin design will similarly come in two flavors: “Classic” (“…takes inspiration from forms of Art Deco. The visual vocabulary is grounded in classicism but modernized through the selection of furniture pieces and color palette… Materials featured in the new room reference those found in natural settings including open grained walnut stained a dark chocolate brown with a satin finish and soft tones inspired by the outdoors…”) and “Modern” (“…contemporary, timeless sensibility without being trendy. Concise, linear qualities give the modern scheme an architectural feel. The guestroom is softened with organic textures that have subtle patterns and sustainable materials that are neutral in color.”)

That’s a lot of words. I still strain to make these descriptions tangible.

At the end of the day, it’s still nice to see the hotels refreshing their designs and incorporating some helpful efficiencies into the mix.

The neatest feature in the Westin room is a pull-out laptop table that doubles as a room service tray. Modularity!

The Sheraton rooms also have a modular theme: The ottomans slide underneath the armchairs to save space when you’re not stretching out your legs.

LED lighting (including night lights and reading lights) are part of the designs, too.

So where can you expect to see these designs? The first Westin hotels with new room designs will be the Westin Phoenix (opening February 2011) and the Westin Gaslamp Quarter in San Diego (undergoing renovation in early 2011). The first Sheraton hotels to be updated are the Sheraton Red Deer in Alberta (opening early 2011) and the Sheraton Syracuse University Hotel & Conference Center (to be renovated in early 2011).

United and Continental, though merged as a corporate entity, are still operating as two separate airlines, with two separate licenses from the federal government. And of more immediate importance to the frequent traveler, they still maintain two distinct frequent flier programs for now. So it is of some interest when the merged company announces that elite-level members of both airlines now have upgrade privileges on both airlines.

But much as merging airlines face internal strife over the seniority lists of pilots and flight attendants, who has the “seniority” among customers with similarly-fat elite-qualifying mileage balances? As of late yesterday, that’s been clarified.

For travel on Continental:

When seats are available, upgrades are automatically confirmed by elite level*. The chart below details when an upgrade may be confirmed, and if your benefit can be shared with one guest traveling with you on the same reservation.

* Premier Associate® members are not eligible for Elite upgrades on Continental.

For travel on United:

This is an adaptation of what I’ve been able to glean from the United and Continental sites:

It’s interesting that United is lumping all Continental elites with Star Alliance Gold status together in the same basket, while Continental is differentiating within the United-internal hierarchy. I suppose this indicates that Continental’s IT systems are more nimble than United’s which comes as no surprise. The end effect: Those on the very top of the United food chain come out slightly ahead of those on the Continental scheme.

In any case, United elites will still be favored on United aircraft, and Continental elites will be favored on Continental aircraft.

And best of luck clearing those upgrades, regardless of the color and design of your card…

Upgraded: Free rental cars for electric vehicle owners
If you live outside the United States and spring for a Nissan Leaf, the forthcoming mass-production battery electric vehicle, Nissan will cover your car rentals for long-distance travels. This is interesting. The Leaf only covers 100 miles or so on a single charge, so it’s not necessarily practical for road trips. Nissan’s offer bridges that gap. For now, though, it’s not available to customers in the U.S. No details yet on frequency of rental, distances covered, or other limitations.

Upgraded: Canada’s Via Rail
Via, the Canadian national railway, is updating its cars, with the first new-and-improved sleeping cars and dining cars going into service between Toronto and Vancouver. More comfort on long-haul trains is always a plus.

Upgraded: Your ears
Your ears may soon be a part of your security screening. You read that right: Ears are a biologically unique marker, and as such, may be included in your biometric profile for international travel. If researchers at the University of Southampton in the UK convince global governments, you too, may soon be identified at passport control by way of your ears. (via @elliottdotorg)

Upgraded: Burnin’ rubber
Reader Jeff sends in a video of an Airbus A340-600 brake test. It’s not quite riveting at first, but in the second half of the video, overheated brakes and tires start blowing up, catching on fire, and creating general havoc. I’m not sure if the video is comforting or not. On the one hand, there’s a lot of time between the time the time the brakes are hit and the time the flames start spewing out, meaning there’s a lot of time to evacuate. On the other hand, what the hell are these Airbus staffers doing!? The repeated expressions of “Merde!” aren’t exactly the sign of a plan coming together:

(Thanks Jeff! via the Presurfer)