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One for the mileage junkies out there in the US of A: Google Checkout, effectively an alternative to Paypal, is offering 2 bonus frequent flyer miles for every dollar spent through December 31, 2007.

It’s capped at 10,000 miles, i.e., spending $5,000 online. If that’s you, Ben Bernanke thanks you for your contribution to the retail-driven economy.

And don’t limit your miles-earning power to the power of the GOOG. Google Checkout still requires real payment from you, which could be via a miles-earning credit card. In that case, you’re effectively getting a 200% mileage bonus on top of the card’s miles.

Plus, if you reach the website of the retailer you’re buying from by clicking through an airline’s online “mall,” you can get another 2, 3, or even 10 miles per dollar, depending on the store. Leverage, baby, leverage!

Mileage bonuses are available on Alaska, Continental, Delta, Midwest, Northwest, US Airways, and United. Conspicuous in its absence: American. (JetBlue and Southwest use a different accrual scheme in their rewards program, so no surprise that they’re missing.)

Related:
- (aff)
- Earn miles by saving your money?
- Why haven’t bankers demanded better frequent flyer mile value?

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Still not my idea of a good time

Reader EF dips into the blog archives and writes:

I disagree with your hatred of the Boeing 757 for international flights. It’s no different than flying from New York to LA, which I do in a 757 all the time. And you talk about the size of seats. I don’t see such a big difference between the seats on a 757 or a 747. What’s the big deal? What do you hate so much about this plane?

Indeed, a while back, I argued against the growing trend of using single-aisle Boeing 757s for flights across the Atlantic. I like my international planes big, and the 757 isn’t big enough for my tastes.

To me, EF, it’s not just the narrower seats. Instead, it’s the single aisle.

The single aisle makes lavatory access harder, even if you don’t have the aisle seat. It means more climbing over people, which disturbs you and them.

So forgive me while we wonk out with the numbers for a moment. Let’s compare the 757 to the most common widebodies flying over the oceans (and yes, we’re talking about coach here… let’s assume your upgrade didn’t clear):

• If you’ve got a 757, then only 2 out of 6 passengers per row (33%) have an aisle seat.
  2 out of 6 have to climb over two people to reach the aisle. That’s 33% of passengers who have the discomfort of the double-climb-over.

• If you’re on a 767 (2-3-2 configuration), then 4 out of 7 passengers per row (57%) have an aisle seat.
  0 out of 7 passengers have to climb over two people to reach the aisle.

• If you’re on an A330 or A340 (2-4-2 configuration), then 4 out of 8 passengers (50%) have an aisle seat.
  Once again, no one has to climb over two people to reach the aisle.

• The 777 depends on the configuration. It’s usually 3-3-3 (e.g., Continental, Delta, Cathay Pacific, Singapore, Air New Zealand…), but sometimes it’s 2-5-2 (American, United), or a tight 3-4-3 (Emirates).
  If it’s 3-3-3, then 4 out of 9 passengers per row (44%) have an aisle seat, and 2 out of 9 (22% - both window seats) have to climb over two people to reach the aisle.
  If it’s 2-5-2, then it’s still 4/9 (44%) aisle seats, but only 1 out of 9 (11%, the dreaded middle-of-five seat) has to climb over two people to reach the aisle.

• The jumbo 747 has a 3-4-3 configuration, with only 4 out of 10 (40%) of passengers per row having an aisle, and the folks at the windows (20%) with the 2-person climb.
• The A380 is like a 747 downstairs and like an A340/330 upstairs. See above.

So the bottom line: A 757 offers the lowest odds (33%) of getting an aisle seat. The 767 offers the best odds of the aisle, with 57%.

Simultaneously, the 757 offers the highest odds (33%) of being pinned in, forced to climb over two people to use the loo. The 767 and A330/340 force no one to crawl over two people.

Sounds to me like the 757 is the worst of both worlds for long trips.

And especially in an age of increased awareness of deep-veined thrombosis, getting out of your seat is something you really should be doing on medium- to long-haul flights.

I’ll stick to my preference for widebodies, thanks.

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Flight delayed? Sue!
A judge in India has ruled that passengers whose Go Air flight was canceled were due the equivalent of US$380 each because of the mental anguish they suffered. Is this a trend? Where can I sue for suffering through flight delays inside a regional jet?

Get on the bus
The American Bus Association wants you to feel green about hitting the road: They claim that buses — ahem, motorcoaches — are more environmentally friendly than passenger cars, trains, and planes. According to their numbers, a bus gets 184 passenger miles per gallon, while commuter rail comes in at 86 and planes only make 42. I’ve sat behind some black soot-spewing buses, and I find this claim hard to believe. And what about all the electric rail out there? Nonetheless, one thing is indisputable: Buses are more efficient than passenger cars.

Which airline has the healthiest snacks?
Domestically, it’s United and their $5 snackboxes according to Charles Stuart Platkin of dietdetective.com. See his post for the lowdown on the various airlines’ snacks.

Business class shootout!
Reader Gianugo has personally tested three of the all-business class airlines that cross the Atlantic. In his tests, Silverjet comes out on top, with L’Avion and Maxjet trailing. (No test of Eos Airlines, but they’re generally at a much higher price point.) The L’Avion review certainly jives with previous reports from the field (here and here). Read his detailed post for the breakdown of what makes these discounted business class airilnes tick.

No more being charged extra fees for returning your car with a full tank
Consumer victory! One of the very first posts on this blog — in its first week of inception, in fact — railed against Budget Rent-a-Car’s practice of levying a $9.50 charge if the odometer registered fewer than 75 miles upon return. This is one of those “what are they thinking” fees that gives the travel industry a bad name. I’m pleased to report that the Federal Trade Commission has clamped down and told Budget to stop. (via Consumerist)

Shameless self-promotion, part one
Chris Elliott, consumer advocate, National Geographic ombudsman, and general thorn in the travel industry’s side, compiled his list of the seven “most influential” travel bloggers. You’re reading one of them. Huzzah! The others: Paul Brady at Jaunted, Arthur Frommer, Holly Hegeman at PlaneBuzz, CondeNast’s Wendy Perrin, Ben Popken at Consumerist (where I’ve been a guest blogger on several occasions), and FareCompare’s Rick Seaney. Nice company to be in, to be sure, and a good starting point for your other blog-reading needs. There are seven runners-up, too, so go read the whole thing. Consider other blogs, like the Travvies winners from earlier this year. (Or heck, the finalists!) And peruse the blogroll in the pulldown in the right sidebar for more great blogs that I read regularly.

Shameless self-promotion, part deux
Upgrade: Travel Better goes audio: You can hear a few snippets of me commenting on recent frequent flyer mile devaluations on Marketplace, which aired this morning on public radio. If you didn’t wake up to the “dulcet tones” of my voice on your clock radio this morning, you can hear the clip and read the transcript here.

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A bizarre little video snippet from the heart of YouTube: A train cruises through the center of a Bangkok street market. The last few seconds are surreal.

Gives new meaning to drive-through…

With everyone talking green these days, and with many environmental groups squarely putting the travel industry in its crosshairs, European mega-tourism conglomerate TUI has announced that it will use its size to make good on the green mandate. The tour company is putting pressure on hotel companies to make their operations more environmentally sound.

“In five years we want minimum standards in all our hotels,” said Dermot Blastland, managing director for TUI UK and Ireland, which carries 30 million passengers a year across Europe to 200 destinations. “We will not feature hotels that do not comply.” He said that he expects other companies to follow its lead, as customer demand drives the move to more sustainable travel.

No specifics on what those green standards actually are, and five years is a long time for companies to catch up.

I’m hoping that the standards include more than putting a card in the hotel room to tell you how to notify housekeeping whether or not you want your sheets washed or your towels changed.

But it’s a start, and if a 600-pound gorilla like TUI gives its standards teeth, then they’re very likely to gain global relevance.

Some may be crying hypocrisy, since TUI operates airplanes after all, which aren’t known for their carbon-neutrality. But it’s a smart business move, even if hoteliers may be crying environmental blackmail. A company that’s willing to step forward and make a move like this signals to consumers that they’re taking the environmental impact of travel a smidgen more seriously than their competitors, and that could tip the scales for some folks weighing vacation alternatives.

Note to airlines: This is how you get in front of bad PR. By taking a stand that improves the greater good, and demanding that others follow or get left behind, the company comes out looking like a knight in shining armor, even if it’s not really a selfless act. There’s got to be a way for airlines to spin their less-than-stellar environmental reputation — or their less-than-stellar passengers’ rights reputation, for that matter — in a way that benefits the masses and simultaneously makes the company look good.

How to add injury to insult: Five United Airlines employees at O’Hare Airport, who were working on the Thanksgiving holiday, seemingly got food poisoning from the airline-sponsored turkey dinner.

The likely culprit? Turkey that didn’t “smell quite right.”

(The airline-food joke is just too easy. It’s just sitting there. You’re thinking it, I know.)

On the bright side, perhaps the employees will get worker’s comp as well as overtime. Whoo.

It was a well-meant gesture on the company’s part, and an effort to mend fences with a thoroughly disgruntled group of employees. Well-played.

Despite their nausea, three of the five nauseous employees returned to work. Something tells me they weren’t picking at the leftovers in the staff lounge later that day.

(Thanks to reader J!)

With the Thanksgiving holiday upon us here in the U.S., the roads, rails, and skies are jam-packed with 39 million travelers. This year, I’m giving thanks that I’m not one of them. The U:TB home office will be taking the next few days off, to recover from the tryptophan low that excessive turkey consumption is bound to bring.

(Incidentally, in the spirit of the Gerald Ford flashback photo, the presidentially “pardoned” turkey nowadays flies to Disneyland or Disney World to live out its days at a petting zoo. And the bird flies… typically in first class. I’m not making this up.)

So for those who ARE traveling this holiday, good luck. The tips I posted a year ago for holiday travel are just as valid today, if not more so.

If you’re heading to one of the major airports, you might want to check Travelocity’s live-blogging from the terminals. Or test-drive Orbitz Traveler Update (look on the right side of the screen, under “Orbitz TLC,” to find it), for live passenger reports from the field (background here.)

But good luck, and a safe journey, no matter how you travel.

At the same time, let me take this opportunity to thank YOU, the readers of this site. Thanks for reading, thanks for commenting, thanks for e-mailing in your tips and questions, and thanks for making online travel-related purchases through the “support” page. I appreciate the time you spend on Upgrade: Travel Better, and I hope you’ll continue to point your browser (or feed reader) this way.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Austrian Airlines recently announced a genuine upgrade on its medium-haul flights: real business class seats. But the picture they used to accompany their public relations blitz (above) is taking the term “illustration” a bit literally. Couldn’t they take a real photo?!

That said, it’s actually a meaningful change for Austrian to put these seats in their Airbus A320s. After all, the majority of “business class” seating on single-aisle flights in Europe involves just adjustable armrests in a regular row of coach seating. That means there’s no center seat, but it’s not a “real” business class seat.

So by offering a real business class seat on shorter routes — albeit a cradle seat, not a top-of-the-line lie-flat seat — Austrian is kicking things up a notch. It’s a small scale, but if it works, it could signal the start of a new trend in Euro-travel.

The new seats will be put into a whopping four planes in the fleet by September 2008, which will cover flights from Vienna to Damascus, Cairo, Tehran, Dubai, and Astana. (Astana? Borat demands a cradle seat!)

Now if only they could get their art department involved.

(Thanks, Benet!)

Thanksgiving is almost upon us. And I’m giving thanks that I’m not traveling this holiday. But in the spirit of the season, how about an upgrade/downgrade cornucopia:

Downgraded: Hooters Style
Kyla Ebbert, the Southwest miniskirt bandit, has posed for Playboy. Glad to know she wasn’t in it for the publicity. Nah, never… What took her so long?

Upgraded: Carry-on rules for UK travel
The UK may — may — allow passengers to have more than one carry-on item again, if airports demonstrate their ability to handle the load. If they pass muster, airports will be greenlighted starting January 7, 2008.

Upgraded: Weight-based airfare proposals
An Australian doctor is proposing airfare based on your weight. Not a particularly practical policy for advance purchases, but heck, hotels have tried it, so why not.

Downgraded: American Airlines’ flight tracking
What did AA do to keep up with the list of 130 diverted flights on December 29, 2006? It kept a list on a legal-sized notepad. Way to work the high tech! (via Consumerist)

Upgraded: Elitism on Greyhound
Greyhound, taking a page from the Skybus playbook, is charging $5 for early boarding on its buses. It’s not a bus with free wifi, but it’s a start, I guess.

Downgraded: Merger Mania
Yes, Delta and United are in play for a merger. Sure, Delta said the airlines weren’t talking. But their stockholders (hedge funds) were. So who the heck knows if this will actually happen. We’ve seen this thing before (United-Continental? US Airways-Delta?) and it hasn’t happened. Bottom line: airlines are making record profits, despite record fuel prices, and yet they still keep arguing for a need to cut capacity and raise fares, which is most easily effected through a merger. This makes no sense on so many levels. I remain opposed to airline mergers, like a broken record.

Pod, cube, or capsule — there are more and more mini-hotels popping up around the world, offering tiny rooms with no frills at low prices. Brands like easyHotels (from the makers of easyJet), Yotel, Qbic, Podhotel, and others are following the trend made famous by Japanese hoteliers. (No sleeping in drawers.)

At the same time that luxury properties are fighting for bragging rights on who can be the most over-the-top, the pods are aiming at the opposite end of the market.

The pods have their place. If you’re looking for a few Z’s at an airport? Perfect. City tourism for the go-go-go traveler who just crashes for the night? Sure. Backpackers looking to upgrade from the hostel for change of pace? You betcha.

But how big is this market, really? Will it succeed in the US? After all, America is still the supersize society, despite some slight recent pullback.

So, the question goes to you, the traveling consumer:

Downgraded: Hotel-room glasses
I’m always a little wary of those glasses in hotel rooms, but now we’ve got hidden-camera proof that we shouldn’t be using them — or washing them ourselves before every use. Fox Atlanta planted cameras in several hotels, including Holiday Inn, Sheraton, and the Ritz-Carlton. In each hotel, housekeepers don’t remove the glasses for cleaning in the dishwashers downstairs. At best, they simply rinse them. At worst, they spray them with poisonous household cleaners, handle them with the same gloves they wore when cleaning the toilet, or dry the rinsed glassware with the same towel you used as a bathmat that morning. Disgusting. (Thanks, James!)

Upgraded: Ways to contact Skybus
Skybus, the notoriously hard-to-reach airline that tries to tell its customers that there’s no working phone number at the airline, has been exposed. How to contact Skybus, according to Skybus? Write an e-mail. After seeing far too many boilerplate e-replies that don’t address the problem, Chris Elliott has posted the executives’ contact information, including e-mails.

Upgraded: Advertisers’ unwitting sense of irony
Skybus again: CapitalOne is shelling out the big bucks to paint pigs all over a Skybus A319. It’s a savings account ad — a piggy bank theme — plus a riff off “When pigs fly,” leaving you, the consumer, with hijinks and hilarity. But if you’re an airline, do you really want your plane looking like a pig? Skybus, the flying pig? Wallow aboard!

Upgraded: Paris wine
Where to find a good wine bar or wine retailer in Paris? Look no further. Dr. Vino hits the scene with yet another installation of his wine maps. The Paris wine map features both stores and bars.

Upgraded: Getting on the bump list
The Cranky Flier notes that United has started asking for volunteers on overbooked flights at the time of check-in. Talk about getting in front of the problem. Unfortunately, the net effect for travelers is negligible, because you can’t (yet?) be guaranteed a bump by registering for one online. You still have to drag your butt to the airport and wait at the gate. Registering online only gets you an early spot on the list, if that’s your bag.

Upgraded: Smokin’ hot suitcases
The joke luggage insert (ahem, the Citizen’s Insertable Swiftness Manifest) posted last week included several jokes about smoking luggage. Now life imitates art. Phoenix SkyHarbor Airport was actually shut down after a smoking suitcase was discovered.

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I admit, I’m a sucker for the Shatner ads for Priceline. His over-the-top self-mocking is pitch-perfect. But beyond the Shat, there’s great news on the booking fee front courtesy of the firm he hawks. Priceline has “permanently” eliminated the booking fee it once charged on regular airfare.

Note that this is for a traditional flight search, by airline, schedule, etc., not the name-your-own-price opaque airfare they offer. (I wouldn’t recommend opaque airfare to anyone but a backpacking tourist with time to kill.)

Priceline and Hotwire have both previously put their booking fees for scheduled airfare on hiatus, but Priceline’s news is to make it “permanent,” and not just a limited-time offer.

This is a blow to Orbitz, Expedia, Travelocity, and any other agency, online or off, that charges a fee. But it’s not a death blow. Neither Priceline nor Hotwire have that great of a fare search engine, though you’re able to buy mixed-airline itineraries on both. Priceline allows multi-city routings and refundable-fare searches. (Hotwire punts and sends multi-city requests to Expedia instead.)

Nonetheless, it’s good to see a whittling down of booking fees, especially in an environment of fuel surcharges and all around nickel-and-diming. Bravo to lower fees. And with the ever self-deprecating Shat, to boot.

Related:
- Priceline flight search (aff)
- Hotwire.com (aff)