For those who, for whatever bizarre reason, don’t make the time in their busy days to regularly peruse the Federal Register, looking for newly proposed regulations by various branches of the U.S. government, you’ll be pleased to know that the British tech journal The Register has been doing the perusing for you. And what they found, albeit several months after it was proposed, is bound to get your hackles up.

Our beloved TSA has proposed a rule (pdf) whereby “all airline passengers would need advance permission before flying into, through, or over the United States regardless of citizenship or the airline’s national origin.” The timeframe for receiving that permission: 72 hours.

The No-fly list and other lists restricting passengers from getting on planes are already in effect, and the TSA argues that it needs more time to compare the names on the expected passenger manifests to the lists of people deemed too dangerous to allow to fly.

The no-fly list concept has always bewildered me. If someone is a threat to security, arrest them, charge them, and try a case against them. Otherwise, screen them, scan their stuff thoroughly, frisk them aplenty if you want, and then let them travel. Anything else — like the ID check at the entrance to security — is theater.

As a sidebar: A recent PBS documentary with the title “Security Theater” tears American airport security to shreds. Enjoy.

In any case, the TSA’s proposal is highly unlikely to go anywhere. No airline wants to close its ticket sales window at the 72 hour mark, since that’s some high-priced revenue. The last-minute travel industry must be up in arms, too. And business travelers who have to travel at the drop of a hat will decry the government’s intervention into their livelihoods. Perhaps most importantly, members of Congress want to be able to travel when they want to, including at the last minute.

No, the point isn’t that we need to watch out for another stupid rule. Rather, this is yet another indicator of the misplaced priorities and bureaucratic, anti-consumer mindset of the TSA.

Travelers don’t need more reasons to mock the agency. We have plenty already. But somehow, we keep getting fresh ones.

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Airlines are catching a lot of well-deserved flak for their declining customer service these days. But it’s not that way across the board. Sometimes, an airline gets it right.

This story of love, hope, and redemption comes to us from the desk of… my dad. Yes, the dadster writes in with some reader mail, with a rave about the service he received from Swiss International Airlines. (The airline chieftains hate it when you call them Swissair, the bankrupt carrier from which the modern Swiss International Airlines emerged…)

Dad flew Swiss coming back from Germany last week. He used 90,000 80,000 of his United miles to fly business class to Germany on Lufthansa, and back on Swiss. (edit: Dad e-mailed to correct me on the mileage…) And predictably, I applaud him for a fine cents-per-mile use of the miles.

The bulk of his praise is for what he experienced on the ground. If you’ve ever just missed a flight, then you’ll especially appreciate this. Read on after the jump… (more…)

Low cost carriers might start offering service across the oceans, soon. They just won’t be offering it themselves. Say hello to outsourcing!

Richard Ziskind, Omni Air International’s senior director of marketing, has been meeting with low-cost carriers over the past year, proposing to lease aircraft and crews, which he said would allow them to get airborne with far less time, money and effort than if they tried long-haul service on their own.

Ziskind said the aircraft, likely one of the 757s or DC-10s in Omni’s fleet, would fly under the low-cost carrier’s brand and with the livery, seating configuration and product it wanted. [...] So far, Ziskind said he was finding the most interest among Asian and European carriers, whose customers are more accustomed to flying charters than air passengers in North America.

What Ziskind and Omni are proposing is what’s called a “wet lease” — leasing both the equipment and the crew. I guess people make planes “wet.” Extrapolate that to your heart’s content.

This sort of thing already exists at the premium level. Privatair, a small Swiss airline, provides all-business class services to Lufthansa, Swiss, and KLM. So precedent certainly exists.

It’s easy to imagine a configuration whereby one discount carrier links up to another in a different continent. Say, Southwest and EasyJet could hire Omni to offer trans-Atlantic links to their respective focus cities. Throw in interlining and codesharing, and you have a multi-national discount network.

But the way the airline business works, this isn’t the kind of thing that happens overnight. (Remember the jetBlue-Aer Lingus “alliance“?) Still, if Omni’s plans go forward, your local low cost carrier could soon be selling tickets to destinations all over the world.

Now, will they outsource the inflight duties to someone else?…

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Yes, I’m asleep, but yes I am happy to see you
The spectre of naked sleepwalking businessmen is haunting Europe. UK-based Travelodge reports a seven-fold increase in the number of cases of sleepwalkers, usually male, often in the buff. It’s become so much of a problem, the hotel chain has started issuing pamphlets to franchisees, giving guidance on how to handle a sleepwalker. “Have towels ready” in case of embarrassing nudity. Noted.

Sioux City, Iowa ROX
Sioux City’s three-letter airport code is rather unfortunate: SUX. But after years of objecting to code, and after considering the alternatives offered by the FAA (GWU, GYO, GYT, SGV and GAY), the city has decided to embrace the code. Paging Hubwear to create the appropriate t-shirts! (Thanks, Will!)

Meet the buyer of the world’s most expensive ticket
So the Airbus A380 took its first commercial flight, with all seats sold by Singapore Airlines as part of a charity auction. The winning bid for the pair of 1st class suite seats went to the fresh-faced 38-year old Julian Hayward of the UK, who spent roughly US$100,000 for the pair. Ouch. At least it was for a good cause, I guess.

Who knew commuter airlines flew to space?
Rocketplane, one of the companies hoping to bring suborbital space travel to the masses, is redesigning their spaceship. You might not know what weightlessness feels like, but the experience of the flight might seem all too familiar: In lieu of a refitted Learjet (!), they’re creating a new design, which looks astonishingly like a regional jet. I hope the legroom is better.

The movie seemed so nice, why is the guy in the uniform so unfriendly?
Nearly a year ago, the U.S. government commissioned Disney to help revamp the image of the United States as a travel destination. Thanks to the post-9/11 paranoia-driven fingerprinting, slow visa approvals, and the perpetually incomprehensible line “managers” and gruff INS agents at airports across the country, the reputation of flying to (or, heaven forbid, transiting through) the U.S. has been in the cellar. Disney’s first visible change: A seven-minute movie, depicting the diversity of American culture. Fine, and good. But until you train the passport checker in a little customer service, you’re still a long way away from people calling the U.S. a friendly place to enter.

George Hobica reports on a nasty practice: Delta, apparently unhappy that some of their passengers had booked cheap tickets on nonstop flights, rebooked those customers onto far less convenient connecting flights. Like cell division, one flight had turned into two.

A friend of Hobica’s bought a New York-Denver nonstop around the holidays for a piddly $138, but…

…a couple of weeks ago, Delta called him and told him he was now on a flight leaving JFK around 6 AM, and he’d have to make a connection both coming and going. Worse, Davis is now flying on regional jets, instead of a big jet.

Naturally, he’s not pleased. There are still seats left on the Delta nonstop, but they’re selling for over $600 RT for Davis’ itinerary. It’s pretty clear what happened here: Delta kicked Davis off of the nonstop, and will now sell seats at a much higher fare than he paid to last minute purchasers.

Before anyone says it: Yes, the Delta contract of carriage (pdf) mentions that schedules are subject to change without notice, but that’s not what happened here. The schedule didn’t change, and the flight wasn’t canceled. Only this one ticket changed. The airline simply rebooked him onto a different itinerary at the same price.

Hobica hypothesizes that the airline is pre-bumping the cheap-seat customers to less convenient flights so they can continue to sell higher-priced tickets on the most desirable nonstop routes. And unfortunately, this is highly plausible.

Note that this isn’t the ranting of some crackpot who can’t tell Delta apart from Skybus. The author is a credible travel writer and the founder of the airfarewatchdog.com fare alert site.

And based on the comments of other readers on his site, the case wasn’t isolated. Several readers report the exact same phenomenon. (Several readers miss the point, too, and rant about schedule changes. Frustrating, too, but not the complaint at hand.)

If this ever happens to you, complain. If that doesn’t work, then escalate.

Related:
- Reader mail: The airline changed its schedule, what are my rights?
- Customer service: the nuclear option

Late for a very important date? Everyone moans about airline delays, and now the U.S. Department of Transportation is using the only language it knows will make the airlines perk up and listen: Money.

Following an investigation into consistently-late flights, the DOT has threatened to fine those airlines who are operating the worst-offending flights.

But don’t believe the hype. This is great PR for the government, making it sound like they’re really going after the delays that plague American airports. But if reports are accurate, then these “fines” are a lot of hot air: Only 26 flights meet the apparent standard for fines, by being late at least 15 minutes at least 70 percent of the time. 26. Two-six. But over 25 percent of ALL flights arrived late between January and August of 2007. 26 flights, or about 26 percent? Quite a difference.

Plus, count on the operating airlines to muck with the statistics. If flight 421 is consistently late, then they’ll change the flight number to 133 and restart the clock. Poof! Problem solved!

Fines, primetime landing fees, or other financial instruments might reduce delays, but the program as proposed isn’t going to do much for travelers.