Snide quote edition:

“Sir, your upgrade didn’t clear, but your cello is riding in first!” Yes, your cello can earn frequent flyer miles, too.

“You sure smell nice. Have you been to an airport lately?” Airport advertising sprays passers-by with perfume. (via Coudal)

“How do you mispronounce ‘Mayday‘? What is it in Italian?” Alitalia flight declares emergency, but no one understands the pilots. Safety first!

“I bet you $20 you can’t get from Honolulu to Hilo for $20 each way!” Fare war in the islands, courtesy of Go!

“THESE people could really have used a $20 interisland Hawaii ticket…” Just click. A Piper can travel from Santa Barbara to Hawaii?!?!

“Welcome to the Sheraton Chicago. I’ll need an ID, credit card, and your Blackberry.” Check your e-mail at the door. Nice gimmick.

“There must be two Manchesters.” Indeed, there are. One is in New England, one is in Old England. Be sure you know the difference before you fly.